Monday, November 03, 2014

Jolly Rancher Omens

Tonight's post, I think, shall be a list of thoughts without much fanfare.

-The baby, who normally breaks records for being the most pleasant and likable child, has been a terror today. Probably not by normal baby standard, but, spoiled as I am, I have had trouble controlling the urge to scream at him. It's probably related to teething or some such. I don't know. He's been waking up at night lately, a habit I had thought for a while was blissfully gone. It's not. Blargh.

-My stomach is not great right now. I've been taking this grass-based superfood stuff in a glass of orange juice every morning. It gives me a lot of energy and I crave it despite it's questionable taste, so that leads me to assume it is very healthy. It's also giving me very healthy amounts of excrement, along with stomach cramps to match. I think the problem is that the fiber and healthiness of the superfood clashes rather poorly with the rest of my diet, which, often, consists of Arby's and greasy chinese takeout-- probably at least one or the other four days out of five. I am on the toilet right now.

-Dan and I are in the midst of a conversation about what's going to happen to replace my phone, which has recently suffered from a mildly cracked screen. This one of about 6 ways that it's somewhat broken, including it's speakers that had melted deodorant spilled into them (It's a long story) and the data chip which stops working randomly, and is malfunctioning more often than not. This is coming at a frustrating time, because I was to be getting an iPhone 6 for Christmas. The details of this are too frustrating to list, but basically, we can't really afford it now, and we won't really be able to afford it at Christmas. But part of the reason that we can't afford it is that getting a new phone means getting off of my shared plan with Zack on T-Mobile, which doesn't work super well out here. This is one of the few remaining holdovers of my marriage to Zack, and the crux of the thing is that Zack has been paying my cell phone bill largely by himself for some time now. Switching carriers is both a practical and moral necessity, but it also comes with the high cost involved with paying for one's own things. This cost, incidentally, is the reason why Dan's parents currently still finance most of the things in his life.

-I am now off of the toiler.

-That last point, or rather, the one before that, brings up this frustrating problem: Dan is not currently financially independent from his parents in almost any way. They currently pay for his cell phone, his car insurance, his health insurance, and all of his clothes via a Kohl's charge card that he carries and they pay the bill for.  They also help pay for Ezra's daycare. The idea-- at least for me-- is that as we gain the ability to afford it, we slowly take over these costs to gain independence. The frustrating thing about this is that, for the foreseeable future, as our income goes up, our standard of living will not, if all goes as planned. We'll gain some modicum of independence, but little else. Which, I like the idea of independence. Really, I do. I just hope I like it as much as all the stuff I'll be missing out on.

-Dan and I started a batch of Jolly Ranchers-infused vodka tonight. The plan is to drink it this weekend. The secondary plan is to get drunk and finally manage to have sex. This depends largely on it tasting really good. I'm counting on you, Milton Hershey!

-I had to look that up just now before I could finish the sentence. I had no idea that Jolly Ranchers were made by Hershey's. Dan and I went to Hershey, PA, once on the way to or...from somewhere. I think on the way back from visiting his dying Grandmother in Maryland. That same trip, we went to DC and somehow decided that it would be fun to visit the Holocaust Museum! Woohoo! Hershey was sort of our little way of saying "Okay, seriously, we need some, like, singing cows and chocolate after all that Jewish sadness." It was a very pleasant little side trip from the days when we were still very happy together. Perhaps this is a good omen.

-My laptop is about to die. Day 21. On with it.