FieryGwenivere: Mr. Leighton (librarian at my schoool/my mentor) gave mr. Nunnery (guidance counselor at my school a copy of something from my website
FieryGwenivere: Nunnery and floyd (teacher I'm really close to) had a meeting or whatever, they dragged me in five minutes into first period and told me they needed me to have a psych evaluation, I had a little mental breakdown, SCREAMED in nunnery's face, cried a lot...,.
FieryGwenivere: floyd skipped all of pre-cal to be there but left at the beginning of pre-algebra, I ate lunch...brb
FieryGwenivere: After lunch I came back, my mom came in, we left. so I only went to one class today. We went up to saint mary's emergency to get the psych evaluation (which I needed before being able to go back to school, as they somehow view suicidal people as being a danger to others, as well or something) and I saw, like, two nurses, a doctor, and a really cool guy named...chris I think who assessed me as being not only not a danger to myself, but the "smartest 17-year-old he's ever met"
Elorza: well, it is Maine.
Elorza: ooohhh low blow
Elorza: heh, anyway
FieryGwenivere: .....you wanna go fuck yourself?
Elorza: so.... are you crrraazzzyy?
Elorza: I have already twice today thanks
FieryGwenivere: try it up the ass this time.
Elorza: where else would I do it
FieryGwenivere: touché


So, yeah, fucking longest day EVER. I guess I could continue to explain it, but I don't really want to just yet. Suffice to say that they seem to be pushing for me seeing Mr. Ladd again, pardon me while I give you all looks you can interpret as you like, and I'm going to wear my hospital bracelet to school for a while as a constant reminder to Mr. Nunnery that he's a liability-concerned buttfuck.

Don't get me wrong- I like Mr. Nunnnery, he's just doing his job, but you do NOT mess with my psyche and get away with it.




Jeremey and I empathize with each other with the subtle but profound communication of typing lyrics to each other, line by line. We've been doing it this way for a long time, and there is nothing in the world that makes me feel closer to him than being able to tell him what comes next in something he has just randomly decided to quote. It's a feeling, for me, of enormous belonging with him. Today, when the crisis team guy asked me my reason for living, I said Jeff, among other things, and there was no mention of the rest of the fab five, but as much as Jeff means to me.....Jeremey is someone that I could not go a day without loving. I've given him as much as I know how to longer than anyone else, and I want to until the day I die. And then I want him to give my eulogy.

"A little out of touch
Little insane
It's just easier than dealing with the pain
I can go where no one else goes
I know what know one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train."
-Soul Asylum


My name is Linda and I will do anything I can for you, babe. Just give me the word. On with it.