Saturday, January 05, 2002

Mark came over to deliver a present he got me just because it's been roughly three years since we became friends and because he's wonderful, and more to the point he seems to think I'm wonderful, and when I'm with him I'm inclined to agree. We ended up doing very little other than my playing around with baking soda and vinegar, and he just left.

I have rentals I really want to watch and a room to clean, but I think I'd really like to go out. Someone claim me!

Only 5 hits to the site since last night and 2 of them were me....I'd like to think this is probably because my site was down, but really- how likely is that?

I'm falling out of the public's favor!

The word "favor"- specifically being in it and out of it, seems to be my word of the last couple of days. I used it just now, yesterday in an e-mail to Mitch, and just now, in a conversation I had with Jeff's friend, Mike the German, in order to ascertain the screename of Roy (I'm still not sure if that's the name I'm looking for). I'm clearly antsy this weekend- I've been overreacting to people about things since yesterday night, but man- there's really no question as to why Jeff's friends, and pretty much anyone else, don't like me.

Mike the German: and you saw him at wal mart
FieryGwenivere: yeah, I think so. But I wasn't absolutely positive it was him, so it's driving me nuts
Mike the German: he told me that he was at walmart and that he met Ryan Hawkes there, so maybe you were there too
FieryGwenivere: when was he at wal*mart?
Mike the German: dunno
FieryGwenivere: when did you talk to him?
Mike the German: two days ago
FieryGwenivere: nah, can't be the same thing
FieryGwenivere: this was last night at like midnight.
Mike the German: oh ok
Mike the German: I bet you are obssessed with him
FieryGwenivere: am I that transparent?
Mike the German: yes
FieryGwenivere: you can see right through me, man, you know my every want and desire
Mike the German: but, you won't have a chance with him - you're not his kinda girl
FieryGwenivere: *sob*
FieryGwenivere: well, I guess I'm just going to have to kill myself now- I mean, ever since I met him- the ONE time- I fell so desperately in love with him that I dedicated my entire life to achieving the goal of getting into his favor. I've been using Jeff for no other reason to get to him- this person who's name I'm not even positive is Roy.
FieryGwenivere: I tell you, every time Jeff tells me one of his catch phrases it makes my heart soar.
FieryGwenivere: Seeing him in Wal*Mart last night was like a dream come true.
FieryGwenivere: I had six orgasms, right there.
Mike the German: ok baby, I gotta go
FieryGwenivere: There was some MAJOR clean up needed in aisle 6.
FieryGwenivere: Oh, not you too! Can't you tell I'm in love with you, too? *sob!*
FieryGwenivere: later.
Mike the German: I got some important stuff to do, see ya
Mike the German: you're fucking crazy
FieryGwenivere: I know it.
Mike the German: you shoul get some major sence in your life and set some priorities
FieryGwenivere: haha, thanks for that
Mike the German: work out
FieryGwenivere: it's like therapy without the high rates! I feel so spiritually cleansed.
FieryGwenivere: You're right, I need to do that...weren't you leaving?
Mike the German: sorry
FieryGwenivere: I forgive you.
Mike the German signed off at 5:14:37 PM.

Me and my adventures with sarcasm.

"And I guess that's why they call it the blues
Time on my hands
could be times spent with you
Laughing like children
Living like lovers
Rolling like thunder
Under the covers-
And I guess that's why they call it the blues."

Music du moment. Appropriez-vous, non?

That is SUPPOSED to say "Appropriate, no?" in French. I asked smarterchild to translate for me. Then I checked on alta vista and "Appropriez-vous" apparently means "do you adapt?". So I tried using alta vista to look up just appropriate, which it translated to "approprié". I double checked that by translating it back into english and it meant "adapted"- I can see the connection, sorta, but if anyone who checked my site tried to translate it, they'd be left entirely befuddled. So, working smarter, not harder (something I've picked up from dilbert), I decided to try translate "Fitting" which, came out as "raccord". And upon double checking "raccord", I got the word "connection". I've just now tried "It fits, no?" which goes from "Il ajustements, non?" back to "It adjustments, not?".

On a whim to see how much the translation could screw up what I was trying to say, I decided to use a long sentence instead: "The music is justified by my current situation, right?". Ironically, while the bitch of a site couldn't get "appropriate" right, the only thing it screwed up was to mix up "right" meaning "not wrong" with "right" meaning "not left", which I quickly remedied by taking it off altogether and putting the actual way to say right- as in "not wrong"- in french at the end...stupid alta vista.

So, let's try this again:

Music du moment. La musique est justifiée par mon actuelle situation, n'est-ce pas?

Or, in german (For the sake of Mike, who would never check this site):

Music des Momentes. Die Musik ist durch meine aktuelle Lage gerechtfertigt, nicht ist es?

I've spent WAAAAAAY too long on that.

As a woman, I'm hesitant to talk about the thought I've just now had, being that the train of thought and actions surrounding it would be inappropriate to explain, and something much more suited to a male, and not explaining it would leave you, my readers, with the freedom and the curiousity to infer what you will about the train of thought and actions surrounding it. However, as someone who tries her hardest to NOT act like a woman, I am rather compelled to discuss it and be done with it- this whole banterous section right here (she says, wondering if banterous is a word) is something that would have been very well-suited to my newsletter, which has gone unwritten for far too long, and whihc I'm rather interested in starting again, if I ever stop wasting my time on this bullshit site. Point being, the thought: If mankind was ever to produce a person who could fully digest corn, we would have to give them a medal of some sort, and probably do an indepth study of them.

That thought, which happened while I was downstairs just now, was quickly followed by my thinking about a charming insult for a math teacher I came up with earlier today, which was followed up by a slight adaptation of the insult to turn it into an idea for a wonderful farce- to write a letter to the Field's medal nominations commitee nominating myself for my incredible mathematical accomplishment of learning the entire Algebra 2 class- enough to pass the final anyway- in just three weeks of summer school.

At first I was thinking that this could just be one of me and Ben's little projects- whenever we go to pizza hut we make an effort to write a letter to send to the White House in the crayons they give you while you're waiting for your food on the back of our place mats, but we've yet to finish one.

But this could be so much bigger- think of it! Me and all of my friends and readers could barrage the nominations commitee with letters for months, until the Field's Medal people reacted, and there was media coverage, and they interviewed us all, and we made Lisbon High School look really bad. And it, and the pretentious math bastards, became the laughing stock of the nation, and I appeared on the tonight show, and Jay Leno (or whoever it is on the tonight show) gave me a special trophy that said "Linda H, For the Great Accomplishment of Keeping the Pretentious Math Bastards on Their Toes". And then I could use it to bludgeon to death Mr.- oh, 86tch that last part.

And now the amusing thing is that I bet there are a whole bunch of you trying to figure out what "Mr." I want to kill, as if I really had an ending to that sentence. Losers!

Ben and I are now discussing whether or not it would be possible for me to adapt this to a newsletter, and whether or not it's worth it. Probably not at all, no, but I hate the idea that there are so few of you who will ever read that. There are currently 38 people subscribed to the long-dead newsletter, though admittedly far less than that probably ever read the whole thing. Still, by now I could force subscriptions on at least 3 or 4 more people. Possible five.

And that makes me happy, because it's been too long since I've produced any, *ahem*, quality writing. So that is my plan for....well, sometime soon- to once again launch Linda's Titleless Newsletter. And to pawn it onto some more people.

I may or may not revisit this subject matter in this- hopefulyl not, my peeked artistic integrity prevents me from overusing things, but until then- those of you who have not yet subscribed to my newsletter may do so by e-mailing me at or by visiting my other website and signing up there.

"Là-dessus avec!"
"Auf mit ihm!"
And On with it!