Wednesday, January 09, 2002

Okay, Blogger's inability to post lately has pissed me off, but I guess that means that the post I wrote earlier wasn't entirely wasted on the fact that I accidentally closed it before posting.

I'd been screwed over about a lot of little things tonight- thinking about my father and my dog and how I haven't had any meainingful contact with anyone ultra-important to me (except Jeff) for a long time- yeah, I know, I just said "ultra-important", things that wouldn't normally get to me except.....I dunno, maybe they should more. Anyway, things that are just standing downers, givens, nothing I actively needed to search for a solution for, just shit that had me depressed in a way I thought I was just going to have to let last tonight.

Then Elorza called- this fucking makes me happy. I haven't had a real conversation with him in so long. Yeah, needed that tonight. I love it when people just go right ahead and make me feel human again without my needing to ask. I love people. Jeff and I were discussing last night that I do- that I seem to have a compulsion to care about people and think of them as good no matter what they do, really. It's sort of optimistic. It's also sort of bad- it leads to me justifying other people's actions for them way too much, and ultimately my own.

But none of that's important, cause Elorza and I talked for over an hour, and he is still coming to the prom (or trying to as best he can) which basically means that the weekend of May 4th is going to be one of the best of my life- and that all my friends are going to be jealous of me. Katie no longer has instant claim to the most physically attractive date category- move aside Tom. (Have I ever mentioned Elorza's really fucking hot? I don't think about him that way in general, because he's my friend and, anyway, I never see him in person, but damn. He'll serve as a nice little trophy.....not that that's why I want him there or anything. Just a major fucking perk. I wonder if he'd be offended to read this...hmmmm...)

So yeah, dancing on clouds now. Love it when fuck it, I just love him. He's great.

I'm gone, though- I MEANT to be in bed early tonight. Worth it, again.

On with it.